Smash the Magnifying Glass
December 12, 2023
The holiday season is a giant magnifying glass. Whatever emotional space you are in this time of year gets blown up to at least 10 times the intensity. This can be a happy thing, if this is a happy time for you. Who doesn’t love 10 times more happy?? Are you in love? Add a x10 to that when you see pretty lights and decorations. In a great place financially? Add another x10 when you hear Christmas carols and see commercials with big bows on cars. You and your people all healthy and thriving? Yup, add a x10 when you see Santa and bake cookies. Yay for the holiday magnifying glass!
But what if your magnifying glass is intensifying something else? Newly divorced? Add a x10 to THAT when you see those same pretty lights and decorations. Financially strapped? You get to add another x10 to THAT when you hear fa la la la la and watch that lady from the commercial scream when her husband drives up in the car with the big dumb bow on it. You or your people going through some health issues and/or not-so-much thriving? You know the drill…add a x10 when Santa makes an appearance and you’re licking the cookie batter
Upon reflection, I’ve always been my happiest during the NOT-holidays or special occasion times; I think this is because I hate the magnifying glass. I want to feel things at a more even keel. It’s not that I hate joy or anything- I LOVE joy! But I don’t like the pressure of SCHEDULED joy when I may not be feeling in a particularly joyful place. Give me an ordinary day with no frills over an occasion anytime. I like a random day in a random month that doesn’t come with the burden of a blown up view or years worth of memories attached to it. I’m sure a mental health professional could have some insights about my reluctance to feel extremes during assigned times (and also about my need to always know exactly how many miles away from home I am at any given moment, but I digress). Here’s the thing; it’s not the real stuff I shy away from. It’s the damned magnifying glass! Think about it. Sad is sad. But CHRISTMAS sad? That’s a whole other level.
I propose we break the magnifying glass, sweep up the pieces so we don’t cut our feet, and tread evenly through this season. Feel things for what they actually are in the moment, without the arbitrary emphasis that this time of year brings. Without dragging out the ghosts of Christmas past or Christmas future. (And if Christmas is not what you celebrate, please insert an appropriate seasonal reference that works for you- all are welcome to my analogy!) Go easy on yourself and your “feels”...feel them for what they actually are vs. what they look like with the magnified lens. Trust me on this one.
*Also, do NOT examine your face or your armpits in a magnifying mirror. Trust me on this one, too.